I used to drive a lot for work. In fact, at one point, my office was an hour and a half away from my home (that was without any traffic, which was rare). This gave me a lot of time alone in my car with the radio on.
Product marketers are smart – they know there are millions of workers who drive to and from work around the same time each day. Many of them are alone (ever notice how few people are able to use the high-speed commuter lanes during rush hour?), so well-placed ads have a guaranteed captive audience. Any way a commercial can help pass the time away on the radio is a well-received distraction. This makes for good business if you get right down to it, which is why in the advertising business, traffic rush hours are considered prime time for commercials. To run a radio commercial during these times is relatively expensive, which is why you tend to hear only the most prosperous companies pitching their products.
Who’s got more money to blow on rush hour radio commercials than cell phone companies? Not many! As a result, the airways have always been dominated by the likes of Verizon, AT&T, Sprint, T-Mobile. I can’t remember which vendor created the “friends and family plan” concept, but let me tell you, it’s been a huge success. Why? Because there are two truths in the cell phone business: 1) it’s really hard to get people to change carriers; 2) once a customer signs a contract, carriers make a lot of money off them (Ever notice how these companies can give away expensive cell phones to new customers? Ever notice how existing customers aren’t ever offered the same attractive deals?). So, the prospect of converting whole familiesin such a highly competitive market is a business bonanza.
Is this a lesson on marketing? I hope not – LOL! However, it does get me thinking about friends and family and how influential these social circles are to us on an emotional level (that’s why good marketing typically involves stirring emotions, because ultimately it sells product). For example, how our friends and family think of us tends to matter to us. We’d rather be well thought of instead of the alternative, right? Why? Well, for starters, it’s because we tend to value the opinions of our friends and family. As such, we tend to do what we can to improve their estimation of us. This desire for approbation can lead to boasting in self. Here’s what the Bible has to say about that:
Let another praise you, and not your own mouth.
— Proverbs 27:2a
Which carries more weight in social circles: a person boasting of themselves or a person whom others are publicly boasting of? No contest, right? Even if the self-promoter is telling the truth, eventually others in the group will tune them out. In the end, the exact opposite of the desired effect is realized by this person – their reputation is actually lowered. “As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil”(James 4:16). Compare this to the person who goes about their business quietly and simply says, “Thank you,” whenever others in the group praise them. In the long term, it’s this latter person who engenders the affections of others. “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness” (2 Corinthians 11:30).
If you have good friends, they’ll praise you when it’s appropriate and they’ll also tell you when you’re being arrogant. They’ll tell you that your boasting is actually distasteful, damaging, even, to your relationships. They’ll tell you this because they love you.
Better is open rebuke
than hidden love.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend;
profuse are the kisses of an enemy.
— Proverbs 27:5-6
The best thing about friends in the family is that they are the most likely people in your life who love you enough to tell you the truth; whether good or bad. The Bible encourages us to stay close to our families because there’s great value in them. In many ways, though they may dish out painful words that wound our pride, members of our family are the best friends we have. We ought to foster those relationships and cherish them because members of a godly household are actually good for one another. The old saying goes, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family.” Isn’t it best when the Word of God brings our family together as friends?
Like a bird that strays from its nest
is a man who strays from his home.
Oil and perfume make the heart glad,
and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.
Do not forsake your friend and your father’s friend,
and do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity.
Better is a neighbor who is near
than a brother who is far away.
— Proverbs 27:8-10
A family that consists of friends is among the greatest blessings of all. By default, family members that are friends of ours are truly the oldest friends we have (we’ve had them since birth). The divine institution of family also provides the most opportunity to encourage each other. “But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called ‘today,’ that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin” (Hebrews 3:13). There are two ways to encourage each other: “sin less” and “do good more”. Families are great for this.
Iron sharpens iron,
and one man sharpens another.
— Proverbs 27:17
Here are some friendly reminders from a member of your spiritual family, yours truly.
“Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.” For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.
— 2 Corinthians 10:17-18
It is not good to eat much honey,
nor is it glorious to seek one’s own glory.
— Proverbs 25:27
“Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.
— Matthew 6:1
If your best friends are the ones in your household, then thank God right now because it is a blessing that not everyone gets to enjoy. If you have a church family, like I do, who are friends of Jesus, then thank God right now! If you have anyone in your life, for that matter, whom you consider family, and they love Jesus the way you do, then thank God some more! I think God has His own “friends and family plan” and it’s truly a blessing to have signed up for it.
Love in Christ,
Ed Collins